Rumour has it that currently there are groups of 22 men kicking balls around for 90 minutes in Germany every couple of hours in a bid to win some “soccer” cup that isn’t even shaped like a cup.
Forget about that. Go visit the far more enjoyable Wet T-Shirt World Cup. Boy those Spanish and French girls can dance. Sexy!
Dear Dirol-chewing-gum-toothpaste-breath-people,
I can’t for like to complain about Tea, and I can’t for like to complain about “Shoomering Reflective Body Lotion” (shoo, sounds like it can be from the Star Trek – maybe for invisibillness), but I can for like to complain about the chewing gum, because your chewies is the chewies I choose.
What the blerrie hell must I do with that big cardboard and plestik holder for the gums? In the old times, every time I bought the shiny new gums I put it to my jean pant money pocket – nice and safe, so that when I’m about to score with the cherrie I can quickly put one of the chewies to my mouth to have the Dirol fresh toothpaste taste which the laddies can for like to like, like.
Now todays when I go out with the Dirol new cardboard package I have to either dance with it on the hand, or leave it to my wheels. And then when I want to kiss the beutif hot chicks I haf to first take them to the wheels so I can quickly chew a chewie, and once they see my Cortina they do not want to be friendly with me anymore.
It are even taking up to the size of my sellular telefone.
Please change it back to the way it were heretofor,
Shaun.
Tags: Dirol, chewing gum, complaint
Things are looking up. Initially I thought I was a nerd. As it turns out, that was a pretty accurate assumption.
However, be that as it may, I came to a realisation last Thursday:
A group of girls walks past Shaun on a packed dance floor at HiFlyerz. Suddenly the leader of the group stops. Usually this would be due to the place being too crowded to even inhale deeply, but no, there’s another reason…
Lead-girl: Wow, someone smells real good…(sniffs air)… Do you guys smell that?
Other-girls: Yeah, mmmmm oh yeah.
Lead-girl: Hmmm, where’s it coming from. (Noses in the direction of Shaun. Bumps into Shaun.)
Sorry, but you smell real good!
Shaun: Thanks!
Bloody brilliant yet again, Shaun.
Or so I thought.
And then I realised, as a Rockstar, well, I just have to accept that I don’t have the time to chat up every woman I meet – I need to be selective and share my time accordingly.
So, Ladies, bring on the compliments, and maybe I’ll give you more than my nerdish response.
Oh, the scent? It’s a secret, kinda. Brilliant tip from Moneypenny which survives til this day.
Google teased us yesterday with the threat of an imminent web-based spreadsheet offering. I decided I couldn’t wait for an invite, so I found the right url to use and logged in. Yay! It’s pretty cool.
Once again, Google have managed to impress with their web-based offerings. While far from perfect, this tool is just what is needed for the majority of average spreadsheet users (I’m one of them). One thing that did irk me was the lack of keyboard navigation while in the middle of a formula, but fortunately you can still use the mouse.
I’m also keen to test out more closely the sharing and collaboration portions of the app.
GMail, Google Calendar, Google Talk, Writely, Google Spreadsheet. Google Office is no longer a rumour, folks.
Microsoft is in trouble – as a third world consumer, I can run an entire business using web-based tools for the cost of my internet connection. (Assuming I have a reliable net connection). Between Google’s apps and free software like OpenOffice, I’m sorry, but Microsoft Office is *dead*.
Tags: google, spreadsheet, office, excel, word, mail, calendar, talk, google spreadsheet
I’m such a nerd. Smoothness just don’t live here no more. Lately I seem to lack the ability to simply communicate with the female form. exemple gratia:
Pretty-girl-in-club: Hi, I like your jacket.
Me: Thank you!
END
What the fuck?
Where was the:
Pretty-girl-in-club: Hi, I like your jacket.
Me: Thanks, I may use clothes to make me look good but I’m pretty sure you’re beautiful all the time.
Pretty-girl-in-club: (smiles)
… continued conversation …
Or the:
Pretty-girl-in-club: Hi, I like your jacket.
Me: Thanks, by the way my name is Shaun, what’s yours?
… continued conversation …
Gimme back my Mojo dammit!